All of my clothes, including those from my shopping spree
The last of my "big" clothesOver the weekend I went through my closet for the last time to remove all the clothes that were to big for me. I was left with 2 pairs of pants and 3 shirts. I concluded that this was not a good thing. All the summer "large clothes" that I had saved were way to big on me. So here it goes, the shopping phase.
I know that this is suppose to be a happy thing; and I don't want to sound like I am complaining, but I am not enjoying this on so may different levels. First and foremost is ~ how the hell did I let this happen to me! How did I ever let myself get so big! Okay, I know how, but it doesn't make the question go away.
Second ~ what a waste of money. I mean, first there is the waste from the clothes that don't fit. Did you know that consignment stores do not take brands that fit large sized women? And if there are stores out there, I can't find them. Then there is the waste of money for buying new clothes! I don't have those kinds of funds. I am looking to second hand stores but still, what a waste of money. It's so frustrating.
And finally, I am not comfortable spending that kind of money on myself. It's not that I don't like to buy clothes, it just that I have to buy everything; socks, shoes, underwear, bras, coats, jackets, tops, pants, sweaters, gym wear, shorts, swimwear. Even my jewelry doesn't fit. My watch looks like I am wearing handcuffs it is so big. And because I don't have anything to wear, I am not leisurely wandering around the mall looking for something that I like. I am in panic mode because I need something now!
Besides all of the emotional turmoil, I am okay. I did buy a pair of shoes that fit. I found 2 pairs of Capri's and 1 pair of shorts. I have 3 new shirts that fit now and should also be okay for after the breast reduction. I guess I have to wait for the sales!
I know that this is suppose to be a happy thing; and I don't want to sound like I am complaining, but I am not enjoying this on so may different levels. First and foremost is ~ how the hell did I let this happen to me! How did I ever let myself get so big! Okay, I know how, but it doesn't make the question go away.
Second ~ what a waste of money. I mean, first there is the waste from the clothes that don't fit. Did you know that consignment stores do not take brands that fit large sized women? And if there are stores out there, I can't find them. Then there is the waste of money for buying new clothes! I don't have those kinds of funds. I am looking to second hand stores but still, what a waste of money. It's so frustrating.
And finally, I am not comfortable spending that kind of money on myself. It's not that I don't like to buy clothes, it just that I have to buy everything; socks, shoes, underwear, bras, coats, jackets, tops, pants, sweaters, gym wear, shorts, swimwear. Even my jewelry doesn't fit. My watch looks like I am wearing handcuffs it is so big. And because I don't have anything to wear, I am not leisurely wandering around the mall looking for something that I like. I am in panic mode because I need something now!
Besides all of the emotional turmoil, I am okay. I did buy a pair of shoes that fit. I found 2 pairs of Capri's and 1 pair of shorts. I have 3 new shirts that fit now and should also be okay for after the breast reduction. I guess I have to wait for the sales!
